Why I Hate Shag Carpet

Today’s blog is a bit scatological.  If that offends you or if you don’t know what that means, you can feel free to bypass today’s read!  As I’ve noted on prior occasions, we have been blessed with a string of … Continue reading

My Jewish Cousins

As I’ve mentioned before, I grew up in Dallas, Texas in the 1950’s.  Not only was I a transplanted Yankee; I was also a Lutheran.  A Papist among the Baptists and Methodists!  Lutherans, Catholics, and Episcopalians were all pretty scarce … Continue reading

The Letot Lions

Have you ever stopped to think about why we do Facebook?  How many mindless hours have I spent scrolling through the endless stream of posts, hitting like, share, or comment?  Here’s a funny political joke–like, share.  Here’s another tear-jerker dog … Continue reading

Smokey Died Today

Dateline:  August 12, 2016

Last Saturday marked two years since my Mom died.  If she were still alive, she would now be 93.  After her death, my sister and I decided that we would tilt a glass or two of wine on her birthday rather than on her death day in remembrance.  Nonetheless, it is hard not to recall that date when she left us for good.  One of the loneliest feelings is when you suddenly realize that you are now an adult orphan with no living parents.  You are now the older generation as the endless cycles of life continue to roll forward.

How often do you miss calling her to tell her the little news of the day?  The Rufus hummingbirds arrived today.  There was snow on the Indian Peaks this morning and on and on.  She was ready to go, frail and in pain, but we weren’t necessarily ready for her to leave.  One of the last things holding her back from that big crossing over was her worry about her two beloved cats, Scooter and Smokey.  Once she knew that they were both well placed, she felt free to leave.

Scooter went to live with a friend of my sister.  He is in a bustling household with two other kitty playmates and three young children.  Always more playful and active than Smokey, he seems to be quite happy in his new domicile.  He loves the kids, and they love him back, and he thoroughly enjoys having two other furry friends to play with!

Finding a new home for Smokey proved to be a bit more challengingSmokeyg.  You may be asking why we didn’t just take her.  With two 100 pound Irish Setters, a large coyote population, an occasional mountain lion, and even a couple of beautiful lynx, our household was simply not an option for an elderly arthritic kitty.  Our doors stand open almost year round with the walk-through type of hanging screens.  We finally just gave up on traditional screen doors as the dogs viewed all screens as walk-throughs anyway!

So Smokey went to live with the wonderful people at the Evergreen Cat Lodge.  This lodge just for kitties does boarding for private guests as well as housing any number of potential adoptees and special needs cats.  Now I am not a cat, but if I were, this is definitely where I would want to go for my vacation!  This place is the Waldorf Astoria of cat boarding.  Every guest has his or her own little room with large glass windows and doors, complete with snuggly chairs, perches, and a private covered litter box—a little touch of feline privacy!   About 40 sq. feet per cat, I would guess.

As a more permanent resident, Smokey had the run of the place.  She found a couple of favorite chairs and hiding places and soon let the other cats know if they dared to get in her spot!  As her arthritis got worse and her kidneys started acting up, she was moved to a more privileged spot in the owner’s private den area where her food, water, bed, and litter box were all within easy reach.  I have to admit I didn’t stop by very often after the first couple of months to visit.  I wasn’t sure how well she even remembered me, and seeing her was a painful reminder of my own loss.

On Friday, August 12th, Susan emailed and called to let me know that Smokey was near death and did we want to have the vet put her down or let her go on her own.  She didn’t think she was in any pain, just slowly shutting down.  After a brief discussion we agreed to let her go on her own terms and not have the vet speed up the dying process.  She always hated riding in the car anyway, and I hated to think of her last moments being filled with an anxiety-provoking car ride.  I told Susan I would stop by on Saturday for a final good-bye visit, but Smokey didn’t wait that long.  Susan called later in the afternoon to tell me she was gone.

We’ll pick up her ashes when they are ready and spread them on the hillside behind the family cabin here in Colorado where we spread our Mom’s ashes two short years ago and our Dad’s oh so long ago, almost thirty-five years now.

Good bye, Smokey!  I hope you are happily purring on your Mama’s lap in a better place.

©The Eclectic Grandma, 2016

 

My Muse is Back!

My Muse is back, and quite frankly, she is a pain in the ass!  I’m not sure where she has been hiding out for the past six months or so, perhaps an around the world trip or something along that line?  Other writers have nice docile Muses, who sit quietly beside them while they compose on the computer, somewhat reminiscent of playing a duet on the piano.  Not mine!  No, she comes screeching in promptly at 1:40 AM every night.

“Lynn, wake up.  It’s time to get to work!”

“Go away. I’m sleepy.”

“No, we have work to do!”

Then for the next couple of hours, she plies my weary brain with endless words, a virtual stream of consciousness.  If I weren’t so lazy, I would get up and go downstairs to my PC to get all of her word smithing down on my computer.  Instead I keep reassuring her that I’ll remember everything in the morning.

“I’ve got it.  Now let’s get some rest!”

“Are you sure?  Let’s run through it one more time.  We need to be sure you’ve got it all down!”

“I told you, I’ve got it!”

“OK, see you tonight.”

Finally she departs to whatever netherworld she inhabits when she is not busy tormenting me, but I’m sure she’ll be back right on schedule at 1:40 AM the next night.  It is now usually about 4:00 AM, and I try to catch a few hours of greatly needed sleep before my two four-legged redheads decide it’s time to start their day.

Then it is time to put the girls out for their morning business.  They, of course, have to check out the entire yard just in case we have had any nocturnal visitors, like a bear, that dared to enter their domain!  By now, the birds have also figured out that I’m up.  The hummingbirds dive bomb me eagerly as I hang up their feeders, and the rest of the feathered crew sit on the deck railing awaiting their turn.  A few of the bolder chickadees even land on their feeder to grab a sunflower seed as I carry it across the deck to hang it in the big pine tree in the corner.

Now it is turn on the coffee, feed the dogs, bring in the paper, and give Mandy her insulin.  Another day, another morning.  If you happen to see my Muse, tell her I got it!

©The Eclectic Grandma, 2016

A Political Rant from a Gun-Toting Grandma!

I feel like a modern-day Jonathan Swift, and if you have forgotten who he was, dig out that dusty old English Lit book!  When I first started my blog almost two years ago, I forewarned everyone that I might cover a wide range of topics.  That’s why I call it the “Eclectic Grandma,” a little bit of everything.  Thus far I have steered clear of politics, but today I have to make an exception.

An open letter to Jeb Bush, John Kasich, Ted Cruse, and several more of you:

I have to tell you I have lost respect for all of you!  When this seemingly endless political campaign started, all of you took an oath to support the party’s candidate.  Of course, never in your wildest dreams did you think that Donald Trump might end up being that candidate.  You were more worried that he might be the one to rock the boat.

Now Trump wasn’t my first choice either, but my first choice wasn’t nominated, so I am supporting Trump.  He is somewhat brash and politically incorrect, but his cardinal sin is that he is a political outsider.  It wasn’t his “turn,” was it?  After the last two dismal presidential elections and the exceedingly poor choices of nominees by the Republican Party, you would think the establishment would have learned its lesson. No wonder the American people are weary with the shenanigans of both parties!

I hear Trump getting criticized for modifying his position on various topics.  I don’t think many of us have held perfectly formed beliefs for our entire lives.  We all have a responsibility to continue to learn, to assimilate new data, and to modify our stance as we incorporate new information into our frame of reference.  I would rather have a leader who listens to reason and modifies his views than one too rigid to change and evolve.

One of the two major party candidates is going to be the next President, sorry Libertarians, Green Party, and some other fringe candidates!  Staying home and not voting is not an option.  That is simply making a choice by omission, rather than by direct intention. The Democrats would like to paint all Trump supporters as uneducated white males, so permit me to give you a brief summary of myself.  I am female (the Eclectic Grandma, right?).  I am Christian, conservative, pro-life, and a supporter of gun rights.  I also hold four college degrees, am reasonably proficient in French, Spanish, and Latin, and at the risk of sounding immodest, have a pretty high IQ.  I have traveled to and/or worked in over thirty countries, including extensive work experience in the Middle East, Africa, and the Far East, so I don’t think I’m some uneducated dummy!

So for whom do we vote?  I heard a great suggestion on the radio the other day; make a list of the most important considerations to you in the upcoming election and then determine which candidate has the greater likelihood of supporting those issues.  Well, here are my core issues:

  • Religious freedom.  While I am not overly religious in the traditional sense, I do consider myself to be a Christian.  Many of my ancestors arrived on this continent in the 1600’s, coming to this country to escape religious persecution in England, Scotland, and Europe, and I strongly support the Judeo-Christian principles upon which this country was founded.
  • The Constitution.  I am appalled at the lack of knowledge so many people have about our Constitution (and American history in general while we’re at it!).  The US Constitution is one of the most perfectly and carefully crafted documents in the history of mankind.  If all of this sounds like Greek to you, I would encourage you to enroll in the excellent, free online course, Constitution 101, offered by Hillsdale College. (online.hillsdale.edu)
  • Second Amendment.  Of course, the Bill of Rights is part of the Constitution, but the Second Amendment to the Constitution warrants a special comment here.  Our forefathers recognized the right of a citizenry to arm and protect itself.  I am so tired of the constant squawking for more gun control every time we have an incident of any kind.  Perhaps we should look at the underlying problems in our society, not at the many thousands of us who responsibly own and use guns (and by the way, I’m a damn good shot!).
  • A Strong Military.  It breaks my heart to see how the current Administration has decimated our military and ignored our veterans.   My ancestors fought in the Revolutionary War to help found this country and the Civil War (more properly called the War Between the States) to help preserve it, and my father and uncles fought in World War II to defend the world against unspeakable evil.  We are the hope of much of the world, and our leadership is sorely needed.  I don’t want to see the US become a second-rate nation.  We need American exceptionalism!
  • Strong Borders.  Now we start getting to a touchier subject!  We can only survive as a country and offer safety and security to our citizens when we protect our borders and monitor who can enter our country.  Does this mean building a wall?  I don’t know, but clearly people who enter our country should do so in a legal, controlled, and monitored fashion, not slipping over the border in the dark of night.  This leads me right into my next topic.
  • Limited Amnesty.  Do I agree with some sort of mass deportation?  No, unless you are a convicted criminal, then bye-bye!  By the same token, I also do not favor a path to citizenship for anyone who entered the country illegally.  How about a permanent legal resident “green card,” but no path to citizenship or voting rights?  Most of those who support amnesty care only about trying to enroll a bloc of potential voters.  Want citizenship?  Then leave the US and apply to re-enter as a legal immigrant like so many others have done before you and go to the back of the line!
  • Lower Taxes.  I am still working at an age when most people would be happily retired.  Of course, in all honesty I would probably be bored to tears if I weren’t working, but I am working for my own family and lifestyle, not to be a little old lady supporting a bunch of people sitting around on their you-know-what’s!
  • Less government intrusion and regulation.  I’m sure that I’m probably inadvertently violating some regulation or other every time I get out of bed in the morning.  The State of Colorado just passed a law allowing people to collect up to 110 gallons of rainwater to water their lawns and gardens.  Isn’t that sporting of them?  I suspect that God, the Universe, or Mother Nature (whichever term you prefer) is having a good laugh over that one.  And this doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface on federal regulations.

I could probably go on and on, but you are no doubt getting weary with this. This is my list; yours may be completely different, and that is fine.  Just take the time to give it a little serious thought, and by all means exercise your right to vote!

To bring everything full circle, Jeb, John, Ted, and the rest of you (and I might add Mr. Romney and Mr. McCain to this group!), it’s time to put aside your sour grapes, self-righteous anger, and thwarted political aspirations, and be a real man!  Support publicly and actively work for your party’s candidate and help him to a victory in November.  If Trump loses, it may be too late to turn our country from a downward spiral toward greater debt, bigger government, more socialism, and becoming a second-rate country!

©The Eclectic Grandma, 2016

Things That Go bump in the Night!

“From ghoulies and ghosties, Four leggedy beasties, And things that go bump in the night, Good Lord, deliver us!” Old Scottish Poem From the earliest days of the human race, mankind has sought warmth, comfort, and safety in the light. … Continue reading

You Can’t Make This Stuff Up!

Yesterday I received one of those phishing e-mails.  It was so fake and poorly written that if I were still teaching freshman English at the University of North Texas, it would have warranted a big, fat, red F!  It did give me a chuckle though as I had my morning coffee.

It was from Chase Bank.  Now obviously this not-so-bright person doesn’t realize that all I have to do is to click on the from to see his real email address.  It started out “Dear Costumer.”  Costumer?  Perhaps he thinks that I am a world-famous pole dancer and need to stock up on kinky costumes or that I run a Halloween costume shop?

We determine that your card is not secured.”  Apparently this genius dozed off in class the day we talked about verb tenses!  “For your protection, we’ve suspended your credit card.  To lift the suspension, click here and follow the instructions indicate to update your credit card.”  Of course, I hastened to click here to be sure that he had all of my information and also to expose my computer to all kinds of malware.  Did you catch indicate?  There go those pesky verb forms again!

Notice:  If you fail this procedure before 3 Days, we will be forced to suspend your card indefinitely, because of the risk which can contain.”  Is it me, or does that not quite read right?

I did at that point call the real Chase Bank using the real phone number on my real Chase Visa card to inquire whether or not the bank followed up on this kind of bogus email.  A very nice young lady assured me that the Fraud and Abuse Department did indeed follow-up on all of these types of fraudulent messages.  As requested, I forwarded the email to the bank for its investigation.  The Customer Service representative and I did have a good laugh, especially when I told her that I hoped that the Chase bankers used better English than this illiterate person.

The moral to this story is that if you want to be a successful con artist, please learn to spell and use proper English!  I have to wonder if the author of this message is a non-English speaker who is just trying to make an honest living scamming the public or if, even scarier thought, he is a product of the American public education system.

Forgive me for cutting this short today.  I have to hurry and send all of my information to the nice Nigerian princess who is going to deposit two million dollars for me as soon as I send her all of my bank account information!

©2016, The Eclectic Grandma

 

 

More Nursing Tales

A couple of weeks ago I told you about getting to take care of THE real Colonel Sanders. That got me to thinking about other memorable patients over the years. These are the patients who touched your heart or, in … Continue reading